Definitive 200 - reviewed.

Definitive 200

1. BEATLES – SGT. PEPPER’S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND

Spare me. The Beatles were very influential but I'm so sick of them I can't listen to them for at least another 10 years.

2. PINK FLOYD – DARK SIDE OF THE MOON

A good album hijacked by every stoner from here to Timbuktu. Ownership of said album increases likelihood you'll be sitting a dimly lit room solving the worlds problems with some dirty hippy by 500%

3. MICHAEL JACKSON – THRILLER

Nope. Sorry, can't do it. Won't put a dime in the man's pocket. He's talented and a great entertainer but he's a pederast and that trumps everything.

4. LED ZEPPELIN – LED ZEPPELIN IV

See comment #1.

5. U2 – JOSHUA TREE

Yes. Absolutely. Could listen to this every day.

6. ROLLING STONES – EXILE ON MAIN STREET

Again yes. The ban has recently been lifted on the Stones for reasons cited in comment #1. However, no Stones songs after 1986 are permitted.

7. CAROLE KING – TAPESTRY

I have no idea how this got on the list.

8. BOB DYLAN – HIGHWAY ‘61 REVISITED

Flat no. Man can't sing and we all know it. If he wrote and played guitar we could negotiate but he insists on singing.

9. BEACH BOYS – PET SOUNDS

I'd put Sounds of Summer ahead of this one but yes. The Beach Boys make you want to jump into a mid 1960's convertible and drive for hours on end with no place to go.

10. NIRVANA – NEVERMIND
11. PEARL JAM – TEN

Yes and Yes. Two gigantic albums that are nearly flawless.

12. BEATLES – ABBEY ROAD

No. See #1

13. SANTANA – SUPERNATURAL

Yes. Santana hits his stride like never before. He has honed his sound to a razor's edge and this is his magnum opus.

14. METALLICA – METALLICA
15. BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN – BORN TO RUN
16. PRINCE – PURPLE RAIN
17. AC/DC – BACK IN BLACK
18. ROLLING STONES – LET IT BLEED
19. DOORS – DOORS

Absolutely. I take a lot of flack for liking Prince but the man is as talented as he is weird (and that's saying something). Back in Black was the loudest album ever made when it came out. It assaults you with a wall of guitar that is one for the ages.

20. GRATEFUL DEAD – AMERICAN BEAUTY

No Dead. Ever. For any reason. Tends to draw hippies.

21. SHANIA TWAIN – COME ON OVER

What am I shopping in the mall?

22. WHO – WHO’S NEXT

Yes. Recent ban also lifted.

23. STEVIE WONDER – SONGS IN THE KEY OF LIFE

Yes. Stevie is the man. Nobody plays keyboard like him.

24. FLEETWOOD MAC – RUMOURS

Meh. I could do without the mumble mouth lyrics of Stevie Nicks. Musically solid however.

25. PINK FLOYD – WALL

Grudgingly yes. A good album that you pretty much have to listen to in its entirety to allow it to be listed here.

26. ALANIS MORISSETTE – JAGGED LITTLE PILL

Really? Hmmm... I don't know about that. It's catchy and there are some bright spots but I can only listen to her once in a great while.

27. NORAH JONES – COME AWAY WITH ME

Yes. Good background music for having a drink w/ friends.

28. EMINEM – MARSHALL MATHERS LP

Yes. Crass and crude but it's hugely instrumental.

29. OUTKAST – SPEAKERBOXX-LOVE BELOW

No comment. Never heard it.

30. DR. DRE – CHRONIC

Yes. Great album.

31. BEASTIE BOYS – LICENSED TO ILL

I once read a review describing this album as "beer soaked frat rock". I'm not sure that's too far off the mark but I still love, love love this album.

32. GUNS ‘N ROSES –APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION

Yes. Brought Rock and Roll back.

33. DIXIE CHICKS – WIDE OPEN SPACES

No and not because of their "We hate Bush" thing. The album isn't great.

34. MILES DAVIS – KIND OF BLUE

No. Nobody likes this guy. They buy his albums to seem like they're jazz conneseurs.

35. EAGLES – HOTEL CALIFORNIA

No. See comment #1

36. DEF LEPPARD – HYSTERIA

Yes. Great album.

37. SOUNDTRACK – GREASE

Great album. Goofy, dated and oh so much fun.

38. MARVIN GAYE – WHAT’S GOING ON

Yes. Love Marvin. Huge talent.

39. BEATLES – WHITE ALBUM

No Beatles.

40. SOUNDTRACK – SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER

No. No disco. I'm still convinced to this day, that the Bee Gees were a joke played on us by Australia.

41. JIMI HENDRIX – ARE YOU EXPERIENCED?

No. A musical sloppy mess.

42. BEATLES – REVOLVER

Last warning. No Beatles.

43. BOSTON – BOSTON

No. Every Boston song sounds like every other Boston song.

44. BON JOVI – SLIPPERY WHEN WET

Yes. Glorious 80's cheese.

45. U2 – ACHTUNG BABY

Yes. Should be in the top 10. A perfect album.

46. WHITNEY HOUSTON – WHITNEY HOUSTON

No. She can sing but no.

47. LED ZEPPELIN – LED ZEPPELIN II

No. See #1


48. DAVE MATTHEWS BAND – CRASH

No. He's kidding me with that singing right?

49. ROLLING STONES – STICKY FINGERS

Yes.

50. GREEN DAY – DOOKIE

Yes. Punk comes back

51. LED ZEPPELIN – HOUSES OF THE HOLY

No.

52. JONI MITCHELL – BLUE

Who?

53. ELVIS PRESLEY – ELVIS AT SUN

All Hail The King!

54. AEROSMITH – TOYS IN THE ATTIC

Yes.

55. LAURYN HILL – MISEDUCATION OF LAURYN HILL

No. Very talented but no.

56. BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN – BORN IN THE U.S.A.

Hell yes.

57. 50 CENT – GET RICH OR DIE TRYIN’

No. Mumble mouth rapper.

58. AC/DC – HIGHWAY TO HELL

Yes. Great album.

59. NOTORIOUS B.I.G. – LIFE AFTER DEATH

No.

60. VAN HALEN – VAN HALEN

Yes. Hugely important album. Second album was better.

61. GREEN DAY – AMERICAN IDIOT

No.

62. BLACK SABBATH – PARANOID

No. Never understood their appeal.


63. EMINEM – EMINEM SHOW

Yes.

64. JEWEL – PIECES OF YOU

Yes. Great singer/songwriter album.

65. COLDPLAY – RUSH OF BLOOD TO THE HEAD

No. Dave Matthews Rule.

66. MEATLOAF – BAT OUT OF HELL

Yes. By law, you must have this album by the time you leave high school.

67. USHER – CONFESSIONS

No. Don't like R&B

68. KID ROCK – DEVIL WITHOUT A CAUSE

YES! Broke the mold and added southern rock to rap. First original rapper in ages.

69. GEORGE HARRISON – ALL THINGS MUST PASS

You can't be serious.

70. BILLY JOEL – STRANGER

Yes. He has better albums though.

71. EAGLES – HELL FREEZES OVER

No. See #1

72. VAN MORRISON – MOONDANCE

No. Bob Dylan rule.

73. REM – AUTOMATIC FOR THE PEOPLE

Yes. Great album.

74. PHIL COLLINS – NO JACKET REQUIRED

Yes. He should have stopped after this album.

75. METALLICA – MASTER OF PUPPETS

Yes.

76. FAITH HILL – BREATHE

Yeah. She's talented and gets in under the Shakira Rule.

77. JOHNNY CASH – AT FOLSOM PRISON

Hell yes. What country music should be. Drinkin' whiskey and kickin' ass.

78. JOHN COLTRANE – LOVE SUPREME

No. See Davis, Miles.

79. PINK FLOYD – WISH YOU WERE HERE

Yes.

80. MICHAEL JACKSON – OFF THE WALL

No.

81. MARVIN GAYE – LET’S GET IT ON

Not this one.

82. BOB SEGER – NIGHT MOVES

Yes. He should have stopped after this album.

83. PAUL SIMON – GRACELAND
84. LINKIN PARK – HYBRID THEORY
85. PRINCE – 1999
86. DEF LEPPARD – PYROMANIA

Yes.

87. JANET JACKSON – CONTROL
88. RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS – BLOOD SUGAR SEX MAGIK

No. Peppers are overrated and this is their best work.

89. DIRE STRAITS – BROTHERS IN ARMS

Yes. Perfect album.

90. TUPAC – ALL EYEZ ON ME

No.

91. MATCHBOX TWENTY – YOURSELF OR SOMEONE LIKE YOU

Yes.

92. RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS – CALIFORNICATION

No.

93. LED ZEPPELIN – PHYSICAL GRAFFITI

See #1

94. NELLY – COUNTRY GRAMMAR
95. CREED – HUMAN CLAY
96. CLASH – LONDON CALLING

Yes. Especially The Clash

97. CELINE DION – FALLING INTO YOU
98. NEIL YOUNG – HARVEST
99. SOUNDTRACK – DIRTY DANCING
100. DIXIE CHICKS – HOME

Flatly no.

101. TOM PETTY – FULL MOON FEVER
102. VAN HALEN – 1984
103. SOUNDTRACK – TITANIC

Yes. All great.

104. CROSBY STILLS & NASH – DÉJÀ VU
105. TLC – CRAZYSEXYCOOL

No.

106. BECK – ODELAY


107. KENNY G – BREATHLESS

I'd rather chew an entire roll of tin foil.

108. NWA. – STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON
109. SEX PISTOLS – NEVER MIND THE BOLLOCKS

Yes!

110. BEATLES – RUBBER SOUL

No damnit!

111. RADIOHEAD – O.K. COMPUTER
112. SIMON & GARFUNKEL – BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER

Yes.

113. DIXIE CHICKS – FLY

Again, no.

114. METALLICA – AND JUSTICE FOR ALL

Yes.

115. MICHAEL JACKSON – DANGEROUS
116. MARIAH CAREY – DAYDREAM
117. SOUNDTRACK – TOP GUN

No. Top Gun is just too goofy. C'mon, Kenny Loggins?

118. ELTON JOHN – GOODBYE YELLOW BRICK ROAD
119. POLICE – SYNCHRONICITY
120. NO DOUBT – TRAGIC KINGDOM
121. ROLLING STONES – BEGGAR’S BANQUET

Yes.

122. R KELLY – R

No. Another pederast.

123. TOOL – LATERALUS
124. OASIS – WHAT’S THE STORY MORNING GLORY

Yes and Yes. Key album that triggered the second British Invasion

125. BOB MARLEY – EXODUS

No, should be Legend.

126. JOURNEY – ESCAPE

Yeah, gotta love the 80's.

127. CHRISTINA AGUILERA – CHRISTINA AGUILERA

Don't know her music but she's falls under the Shakira rule. (So hot she's included anway)

128. JAY-Z – BLUEPRINT

Don't know the album but Jay is the top of the ranks as far as rappers.

129. ALICIA KEYS – DIARY OF ALICIA KEYS

Meh. Sure. Why not.

130. SOUNDTRACK – O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU?

Yes. Love this album. American roots music that brought bluegrass back to recognition.

131. CARS – CARS

Yes. I like the cars but they're one of those once in a while bands.

132. ENYA – DAY WITHOUT RAIN

OK. New age with a celtic flavor.

133. NATALIE COLE – UNFORGETTABLE WITH LOVE NATALIE COLE

No thanks. I'll take Nat instead.

134. SOUNDTRACK – FOOTLOOSE

No. Too goofy for words.

135. LIONEL RICHIE – CAN’T SLOW DOWN

No. I'm hoping if he can't slow down he'll just pass me by.

136. SARAH MCLACHLAN – SURFACING

Yes. Well written and produced. Great basslines on "Possession"

137. BONNIE RAITT – NICK OF TIME

No. One song does not an album make.

138. METALLICA – RIDE THE LIGHTNING

Yes. Love these guys.

139. SHERYL CROW – TUESDAY NIGHT MUSIC CLUB
140. FRANK SINATRA – IN THE WEE SMALL HOURS

Yes and Yes. Singer songwriters at their best.

141. EARTH WIND FIRE – GRATITUDE

No. Don't need any band with this many members.

142. ZZ TOP – ELIMINATOR

Yes. Grandaddy's of Southern Rock

143. WILLIE NELSON – RED HEADED STRANGER

We covered this. No Willie.

144. JOHN LENNON – IMAGINE

Absolutely not. Imagine may be the dumbest song of all time.

145. TONI BRAXTON – TONI BRAXTON

No. Don't like her. "Unbreak my heart" is OK though.

146. ETTA JAMES – AT LAST

Yes. Awesome voice and drenched with emotion.

147. ELVIS PRESLEY – ELVIS PRESLEY

Elvis should be on this list several times.

148. CAT STEVENS – TEA FOR THE TILLERMAN

No. He's annoying and preachy.

149. SMASHING PUMPKINS – MELLON COLLIE & THE INFINITE SADNESS

No. Overrated and Billy Corgan can't sing.

150. DAVE BRUBECK – TIME OUT

No.

151. JANET JACKSON – JANET

Talented but no.

152. QUEEN – A NIGHT AT THE OPERA

Yes. Great stuff.

153. OZZY OSBOURNE – BLIZZARD OF OZZ

No. Doesn't hold up.

154. WILL SMITH – BIG WILLIE STYLE

Rap lite. Yes in the summer at a party, otherwise, no.

155. PRINCE – SIGN OF THE TIMES

Yes. Prince is awesome

156. PUBLIC ENEMY – IT TAKES A NATION OF MILLIONS TO HOLD US BACK

Yes, yes yes. Album broke the mold in the rap world.

157. BOB DYLAN – BLOOD ON THE TRACKS

Would you stop with the Bob Dylan already?

158. GEORGE MICHAEL – FAITH

Don't know any more than the one or two songs so, no. Plus he's a total jerk.

159. BOYZ II MEN – COOLEYHIGHHARMONY

Yes. Anyone who pushes Elvis off the longest running single record wins.

160. DESTINY’S CHILD – WRITING’S ON THE WALL

No. Talented but overproduced overpackaged group.

161. JAY-Z – BLACK ALBUM

Yes. Simple amazing album.

162. AVRIL LAVIGNE – LET GO

You're just checking to see if I'm still reading aren't you?

163. FUGEES – SCORE

No. They're a glorified cover band.

164. MADONNA – LIKE A VIRGIN

Yes. Madonna is annoying and pretentious but she's still great.

165. LED ZEPPELIN – LED ZEPPELIN

No. See #1

166. STEVIE RAY VAUGHN – TEXAS FLOOD

No. Suffers from Bob Dylan Syndrome. (Just play, no singing)

167. STONE TEMPLE PILOTS – CORE

No. They're currently on hold due to overexposure in the mid 90's

168. ORIGINAL CAST – PHANTOM OF THE OPERA HIGHLIGHTS

Yes.

169. JETHRO TULL – AQUALUNG

No. No no. A thousand times no.

170. TUPAC – ME AGAINST THE WORLD

No. One of the chief purveyors of the thuggish attitude in rap.

171. DAVID BOWIE – RISE AND FALL OF ZIGGY STARDUST

Nah. Tired, overdone and overwrought.

172. SHAKIRA – LAUNDRY SERVICE

I've only heard one of her songs but she's smokin' hot so she's in.

173. SOUNDTRACK – FORREST GUMP

Meh. I guess so. Yes.

174. AL GREEN – CALL ME

No.

175. CURTIS MAYFIELD – SUPERFLY

Who?

176. LIVE – THROWING COPPER

Yes. Great album.

177. GEORGE BENSON – BREEZIN’

Yes. Love George. Grew up with his son so he gets a pass.

178. WHITE STRIPES – WHITE BLOOD CELLS

No. Overrated. Bad lyrics, lame vocals and a drummer who sounds like a 4 year old on daddy's drum set.

179. LYNYRD SKYNYRD – PRONOUNCED LEH-NERD SKIN-ERD

Sure. My favorite rednecks.

180. SADE – DIAMOND LIFE

No. Smooth Jazz is for...actually I don't know what it's for.

181. FLEETWOOD MAC – FLEETWOOD MAC

No. If anything they get one on the list and grudgingly at that.

182. PAUL MCCARTNEY & WINGS – BAND ON THE RUN

God no. Lame lame lame.

183. BEYONCE – DANGEROUSLY IN LOVE

Stop it. Just stop it.


184. ANITA BAKER – RAPTURE

Are you kidding me?

185. NAS – IIIMATIC

Nas? Nas!? C'mon.

186. BARBRA STREISAND – A STAR IS BORN

I'd rather do my own dentistry with a bottle of whiskey and a router.

187. EARTH WIND FIRE – THAT’S THE WAY OF THE WORLD

No.

188. ANITA BAKER – RHYTHM OF LOVE

Who?

189. JAY-Z – IN MY LIFETIME VOL 1

Gotta love Jay-Z. Guy is a genius.

190. LL COOL J – MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT

Yes. I'd add 14 Shots To The Dome also.

191. STEELY DAN – AJA

No. Dated and doesn't hold up.

192. WILLIE NELSON – STARDUST

I like Willie but no.

193. ARETHA FRANKLIN – SPARKLE

Nah. If I need an Aretha fix, I'll watch The Blues Brothers.

194. ANDREA BOCELLI – ANDREA

Yes. Hugely talented and rich voice that marks him as one of the top voices in the business.

195. BOB DYLAN – BRINGING IT ALL BACK HOME

We covered this. No Dylan.

196. LUTHER VANDROSS – NEVER TOO MUCH

No. Next!

197. U2 – ALL THAT YOU CAN’T LEAVE BEHIND

Meh. I guess so. I have a soft spot for U2 so they get a pass.

198. RUSH – 2112

Yes. Geddy's voice is really high but still a great album. No laughing at the band photo on the back cover.

199. OUTKAST – AQUEMINI

No comment. Never heard it.

200. GRAND FUNK RAILROAD – WE’RE AN AMERICAN BAND
No. Dinosaur's 70's rock

Comments

Hube said…
WOW! Can't believe you actually covered all 200! Excellent work!

There's too many recent groups/singers on the list for my taste. How can they be dubbed "definitive" when they've only been around a few years?

I used to be a HUGE Earth, Wind & Fire fan (still like 'em) and they couldn't even get their two entries right. "Gratitude" is a terrific album, but it's a live album of their previous songs. And "That's the Way of the World" isn't even close to the greatness of "All 'n All" or "I Am."

And if Rush's "2112" made it, what about "Moving Pictures"?

Anita Baker's "Rapture" definitely deserves its spot, as does George Benson's "Breezin'." "Breezin'" is simply SENSATIONAL.
G Rex said…
Wow, talk about dedication to a task. Okay, I'm with you on pretty much everything but dissing Stevie Ray Vaughn. If Texas Flood (and Couldn't Stand the Weather) could make a Gibson loyalist like me pony up for a Strat, that's some kinda influence.

I'm also with you on the Beatles thing, but I make an exception for Revolver, and not because it was the first album I ever owned.

Can't understand why London Calling is all the way down at 96 - top 20 at least!

Supernatural was Santana reborn and repopularized, but #13? Where's Abraxas??? (That's the one with Black Magic Woman and Oye Como Vas, for all those newbies out there)

Why do these guys hate Art/Prog Rock so much? No Yes, Genesis, ELP, anything. Roundabout made me take lessons!

Last thing, Miles Davis is cooler than cool, man. Check out his version of Porgy and Bess or Sketches of Spain.
The Zwicker said…
Legend for Bob Marley? My rule for top album lists is to not use greatest hits compilations.

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