My life in tech support

So we went live with our new software this morning. Things have been very quiet. Such silence was unexpected by my manager. He is unwise in the ways of users. He is yet unable to snatch the pebble from my hand.

If this actually were Kung Fu, the meeting we had on Friday would have gone thusly:

(NB: for our purposes, I am The Master and he is The Student)

Student: Master, we will have many calls and requests on Monday morning. You must arrive extra early

Master: I'm already here by 7:00 and no, my pupil, there will not be any extra calls on Monday.

S: How can this be? Our new software is going live. All users who failed to show up to myriad training sessions will be lost and unable to run their reports.

M: Yes, and?

S: What do you mean, "and"? How will they use the new system

M: You fail to see because you do not know where to look. The old system is still online for 3 more weeks. No users will use the new system while the old is still available. The day we shut off access to the old system is the day we will get many calls.

S: You are indeed wise, Master. I bow to your superior wisdom in the ways of users.

(OK, so I embellished that last bit but you get the point.)

Law Of System Conversion: Users will use the old system until you revoke their access.

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