Good quotes from random sources.

"There are two major products that came out of Berkeley: LSD and Unix. We don't believe this to be a coincidence." Jeremy S. Anderson

"You can't be a Real Country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer." Frank Zappa

"Without lying there would be no sex." Jerry Seinfeld

"It's all very well in practice, but it will never work in theory." French management saying
"With Epcot Center the Disney corporation has accomplished something I didn't think possible in today's world. They have created a land of make-believe that's worse than regular life." P.J. O'Rourke

"... The metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the 9-millimeter bullet." Dave Barry

"I want to find a voracious, small-minded predator and name it after the IRS." Robert Bakker, palentologist

"Manchester, New Hampshire is a broken down mill-town ... with an aggressive Chamber of Commerce and America's worst newspaper. There is not much else to say for it, except that Manchester is a welcome change from Washington, D.C." Hunter Thompson
"The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop." P.J. O'Rourke

"If you have a job without aggravations, you don't have a job." Malcolm Forbes
"When they call the roll in the Senate, the senators do not know whether to answer 'Present' or 'Not Guilty.'" Theodore Roosevelt

"The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television." Unknown
"People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs." Anonymous

"A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices." William James

"Speak the truth, but leave immediately after." Slovenian proverb

"By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest." Confucius
"Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity." Nick Diamos

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