This is very strange...
I'm an average guy with an average life. I have a few more kids than most but for the most part I'm just an anonymous lumpenprole toiling away in obscurity both professionally and on this blog. To say my life follows a certain routine is like saying " The Hindenburg caught fire." That is to say, technically accurate but wildly understates the truth. In any event, I just received a call from The Wife. To wit: "Did you order something?" "No, why?" "There's something here for you." "Uh, box, bag, envelope, singing telegram?" "It's a box" "Who's is from?" "It's from [Name redacted pending confession or further investigation]" "Who?" "(repeats name)" "No idea. Never heard of him." A quick google search later I find that the sender's return address is in the wilds of northern Pennsylvania. A place I have never visited. "Open it." "W...

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She'd wait until it was a full-grown deer. Then she'd eat it. Unless it's female. Then she'd shoot, dress, and eat its boyfriend because he's a far more expendable part of the hunting ecosystem.
I can see the new ad.
"Sarah Palin wants you to believe she is a good Christian, but she ate this faun live on national television. Do you want a candidate that eats cute and fuzzy animals?
Sarah Palin, wrong for Bambi, wrong for America!"