Reflections on fatherhood.
Work work work. I'm weary of this job and am really looking for a change. I like the people I work with and it's not my job per se. It's just the routine I guess. I don't have alot of job satisfaction and am not learning as much as I'd like. Most of this is my fault. I'm so tired all the time and unmotivated that I can't give my best effort. I think I'm burned out. I haven't had a vacation in a LONG time let alone a day off in ages. (NB: by "day off" I truly mean a day that I can relax and do whatever I want w/out having to worry about taking care of the house or the kids. Such is the life of a parent.)
I wanted to take some time and head to New England for leaf peeping season but that's clearly not in the cards. I was given a weekend in Jim Thorpe, PA for my birthday. No idea what happened to that one. It's the kinda thing where I hate to ask about now that it's....6 months later and I haven't even thought about going. Before I know it the holiday season will be carrying me along like a body surfer who is carried to the shores of Valentine's day on Post-Holiday beach. I usually have the same feeling after both. I can't believe it's over and I went through all that preparation for such an ordinary ride. The brighest spot of the coming year is shore (get it?) to be the birth of my son. He's due to arrive on Jan 10th.
It's a funny thing being an expectant father. Especially the third time. At first I was feeling guilty because I thought I wasn't excited about #3 (as he's currently known) but that's not it. It's more a sense of calm. I know what to expect and what the first few months will be like and it's nothing to get too worried about. The wife will invariably wake up in serious pain in the middle of the night and we'll head off to the hospital. The baby will be born and I'll go home exhausted and my wife will attempt (but fail) to get some rest. The idea that people go to hospitals to "rest" is patently absurd. There is no rest in a hospital. There are constant PA announcements, phones ringing, visitors visiting, nurses on rounds, monitors chiming the end of an IV bag and so on. There are lights on in your room at all hours and the lights from the parking lot invariably stream in through the gaps in the blinds. The bed is uncomfortable and narrow with cold metal rails.
I, on the other hand, will get my last good night's sleep for many moons. I will collapse into a bed that seems to have grown 10 fold. If you've shared a bed with a pregnant woman you know whereof I speak. Even the most petit preggo can expand to take over an entire california king leaving her companion a K-shaped space formed by the bend of her knee. As I have done this twice before, I am now able to sleep on a the edge of a 2X4 so long as it has a modicum of padding.
My room will be dark and I will slumber for as many hours as I can. I will need them. A few days after my last visit by Morpheus my wife will come home with my newly minted son.
Is there anything better than being a father?
Work work work. I'm weary of this job and am really looking for a change. I like the people I work with and it's not my job per se. It's just the routine I guess. I don't have alot of job satisfaction and am not learning as much as I'd like. Most of this is my fault. I'm so tired all the time and unmotivated that I can't give my best effort. I think I'm burned out. I haven't had a vacation in a LONG time let alone a day off in ages. (NB: by "day off" I truly mean a day that I can relax and do whatever I want w/out having to worry about taking care of the house or the kids. Such is the life of a parent.)
I wanted to take some time and head to New England for leaf peeping season but that's clearly not in the cards. I was given a weekend in Jim Thorpe, PA for my birthday. No idea what happened to that one. It's the kinda thing where I hate to ask about now that it's....6 months later and I haven't even thought about going. Before I know it the holiday season will be carrying me along like a body surfer who is carried to the shores of Valentine's day on Post-Holiday beach. I usually have the same feeling after both. I can't believe it's over and I went through all that preparation for such an ordinary ride. The brighest spot of the coming year is shore (get it?) to be the birth of my son. He's due to arrive on Jan 10th.
It's a funny thing being an expectant father. Especially the third time. At first I was feeling guilty because I thought I wasn't excited about #3 (as he's currently known) but that's not it. It's more a sense of calm. I know what to expect and what the first few months will be like and it's nothing to get too worried about. The wife will invariably wake up in serious pain in the middle of the night and we'll head off to the hospital. The baby will be born and I'll go home exhausted and my wife will attempt (but fail) to get some rest. The idea that people go to hospitals to "rest" is patently absurd. There is no rest in a hospital. There are constant PA announcements, phones ringing, visitors visiting, nurses on rounds, monitors chiming the end of an IV bag and so on. There are lights on in your room at all hours and the lights from the parking lot invariably stream in through the gaps in the blinds. The bed is uncomfortable and narrow with cold metal rails.
I, on the other hand, will get my last good night's sleep for many moons. I will collapse into a bed that seems to have grown 10 fold. If you've shared a bed with a pregnant woman you know whereof I speak. Even the most petit preggo can expand to take over an entire california king leaving her companion a K-shaped space formed by the bend of her knee. As I have done this twice before, I am now able to sleep on a the edge of a 2X4 so long as it has a modicum of padding.
My room will be dark and I will slumber for as many hours as I can. I will need them. A few days after my last visit by Morpheus my wife will come home with my newly minted son.
Is there anything better than being a father?
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